I Am Turning 50

Life on the Edge

The Fountain of Youth

I’ve been thinking a lot about aging lately.  Primarily because I am.  Turning the half-century mark in less than six months makes one a little more reflective.  Sometimes I feel like I am closing in on getting my senior’s discount, usually after a night of acting like I got in using my student card.

But with age comes wisdom and an allowance for pontification.  So, I am going to offer my advice for attaining the fountain of youth.  It won’t be the typical, drink eight glasses of water a day, eat fish and exercise, although I am sure that can’t hurt.  Unless you live in Japan and are not convinced about the water or the fish.

Let’s start with the physical.

Number 1 – Buy a new pair of jeans.  I learned this from a friend a long time ago.  Wearing some out of date flares, she suggested I get some new “low-rise” jeans.  I took her advice. For me jeans shopping is right up there with bikini shopping on the self-esteem destruction scale.  I remember when my daughter was going through a “growing” phase and found all the jeans she tried on too tight, I had to explain that the sizing of jeans is about as consistent as the press releases from the “Occupy Wall Street” movement. And when you buy them, make sure they are not as tightly-fitted as the anorexic salesgirl’s are.

Betsey Johnson

Number 2 – Let your hair grow a few inches.  I know I am giving away my age again, like I didn’t in the opening line, but I think long hair reminds one of one’s youth.  “Back in the day” as my daughter calls it. Who cares that the generation after Gen X thinks you have “big” 80′s hair.  Now I know there is a contingent that would say “get a new chic short haircut” to look young but I think there’s nothing better than a longish, carefree mane to show vitality.

Number 3 – Don’t pluck your eyebrows (too much).  My good friend was bemoaning the thinness of her eyebrows. saying they looked like 70′s brows, which was when she began to pluck them.  What we don’t realize is that, unlike hair on the rest of your body, they do not grow back thicker!

Number 4 – update your ipod selection.  While mine remains stocked with Led Zeppelin, and Aerosmith, I discovered there was some good “new” music when I accidentally synced my ipod with my daughter’s library (much to her dismay).  My favorite ‘new ‘ song is Low, by Flo Rida which I guess is about four years old now. Virtually a new release for me.

 

Now, let’s move to the mental.

Number 5 – Don’t assume it is your job to be the “designated driver” of your relationship.  Many women lose (suppress) who they really are when they get married and have children.  They occasionally let loose when they go out with the girls but chide their husbands when they are out together.  It’s not your responsibility alone, let him take his share, he wants to be part of the team.  You were both crazy, probably a little inebriated and uninhibited when you met, so stick with it.  This will keep you young at heart and your husband happy.

Number 6 – Sort of goes with number 5, but keep dancing on the bar, wear thigh-leather boots like my friend Mona who looks amazing, and then make a pact with your friends to tell you when it’s time to ‘call it a night’.  I know I don’t want to be dancing on the bar when I need help to get down.  Even now my husband has to hold my glasses and my friend hurt her knee getting off one night.  My worlds started to collide when my daugther began going to the same clubs I did.  We would have to text ahead of time to make sure our paths didn’t cross because, OMG, that would be SO embarrassing.

So, I’m off to dinner with a fun group of friends, I won’t be dancing on the bar tonight because I sprained my ankle, but I will be wearing some boots and partying with my husband because I want, as Thoreau says, to live deliberately, live deep and suck the marrow out of life.

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